SOLUTIONS TO HOMEWORK HASSLES
I am so happy you have found the 3D Parent Podcast. My name is Beaven Walters, and I am your host. Before I created the 3D Parent, I spent over 10 years teaching in various educational settings. I have always had a passion for working with children. After my first child was born, and not too long after my second, I discovered I was truly passionate about parenting in a way that worked for my children. So, I became a certified parent coach to help not only myself, but other parents who were struggling through a tough season in parenting just like me.
This podcast was created with the parent in mind. I am going to be covering the 3D Parent method and systems, so you can gain tangible tools to help you bring dignity, direction and deep connection to your family dynamic. My goal is to help you become the most confident parent you can be, and feel empowered in your parenting choices.
THINGS YOU WILL LEARN IN EP. 13: SOLUTIONS TO HOMEWORK HASSLES
[1:27] This episode is all about supporting your child in their education while maintaining your relationship. So I open this episode with some background of how I struggled with homework and our relationship with my first born child.
[4:23] Some things I learned from my experience: first, I was allowing homework to affect my relationship with my daughter. Second, I wasn’t communicating with my child’s teacher. Finally, I removed myself from the homework ritual. I gave my daughter the tools she needed and I stepped back.
[10:59] Now I have developed a system inspired by a book written by Dr. John Rosemond, called Ending the Homework Hassle. And what I’ve borrowed is the ABC’s to relieve homework stress.
[11:29] “A” stands for all by myself. It is okay for your child to learn at a young age to do homework on their own. By always jumping in, you’re actually communicating you don’t think they can do it on their own.
[13:01] When you do back off, set your kids up for success by providing support. For example, I created a homework survival kit to keep my daughter’s homework and supplies in one place, and I set up a distraction free space for her to work.
[16:37] “B” stands for back off. Pretty self explanatory and so key to this process.
[18:10] Keep in mind, frustration with homework is so common. The tantrums, meltdowns and tears may have to happen. Allow them to process this discomfort, comfort them, but don’t bail them out of their homework.
[19:09] “C” stands for call it quits and communicate with your child's teacher. Know when you kid is maxed out and it is time to say when. If a child is spending extended periods of time doing homework, cut them off and communicate with their teacher to try to come up with a solution so your child isn’t becoming overwhelmed or stressed.
[23:59] “Apostrophe S” stands for save the screens until after homework is complete. Set up a specified time limit and allow them some time to play, but not before homework. That time is for a snack, some free play, maybe chores, but no screens. Homework following screens is going to be incredibly difficult for your child and for you.
(PS. Keep your eyes out for a whole episode covering screen time coming soon!)
QUOTES FROM SOLUTIONS TO HOMEWORK HASSLES
“And of all the things having to do with parenting, the thing that I thought that I would be able to handle the best, that would be the least struggle, was anything having to do with education or supporting my child in their education …”
“I had made it all about me. I had somehow put this in this category of I was going to get judged or I was going to be a bad parent if my child's homework wasn't done, if it wasn't done to my standards and if it wasn't turned in on time.”
“They get the help when they have to take that step to actually come and find you. They sometimes find it within themselves to find a solution on their own. We want to have kids develop this sense of initiative that does not require so much support from parents, unless it's really warranted.”
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LISTENING …
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